No Expectations, No Disappointments

We all have preferences or things we look for in our relationships, jobs, lifestyle, etc. but when these preferences turn into expectations, that is when things can turn problematic.  The difference between a preference and an expectation is that you are able to live with and work around your preferences but with an expectation it is more of an all or nothing attitude.  This attitude will almost always end in disappointment because it is only limited to your ideal of the way things are supposed to be.  I think it is very healthy to embrace our differences in a relationship or situation.  It teaches us conflict resolution skills and can open our minds to new ways of thinking.  You don’t have to agree with the differences but you should at least try to respect it.  However I do believe there are some things you should never have to compromise especially if it goes against your personal morals or ethics.  For example, finding out your friend is a racist.  Maybe you can help your friend see the light but if they can’t then you shouldn’t have to put up with it.  Also there are many times when you just simply realize that a relationship or situation just isn’t for you and that is perfectly fine too...if you don’t jive, you don’t jive.  But if you value the relationship, a foundation of compromise and trust is key.👩🏻‍💻